Solitude

I used to be someone who can’t stand being alone; someone who found the sound of silence deafening and overwhelming. I felt choked by it. I used to feel like everyone was watching me if I were alone in public, which of course, I have come to discover is far from the truth because, honestly, the general public could not care less about my life. Yet my desire to be alone has escalated exponentially over the year. Now I find myself wanting to be alone all the time. When I am alone, I am left to enjoy the world I hope to live in, which ceases to exist when intruded by the presence of other people.

Through these thin dorm walls, I hear the muffled stomping of feet, murmured conversations and feel the lingering taste of brownie crumbs on my tongue. I am content behind these walls. The only things that will draw me out of my cave of solitude are the possibilities of snagging a square of fresh brownie and a full bladder.

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2 thoughts on “Solitude

  1. Do you live in a dorm? I realized when I was living in the dorms for two years (and even now in my apartment-with-thin-walls) that I was NEVER alone. The only time I would be alone would be if I was in the bathroom, so I always felt like I was losing a sense of who I am because I couldn’t spend any time with myself. So I kind of know exactly how you feel, and ironically, I’m not alone in this and neither are you. :)

    • yeah, i live in a dorm now. i think my ideal living situation would be to have my own room i can escape to whenever i want to and have an open living area i can go to when i want company. hopefully that’ll work out next year. and i love the irony! :)

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